It is I who thank you. My teacher, inspiration, and friend.

the silent wave

So, here I am. Sitting on the deck, gazing at the trees, in some semblance of peace.

Since alexithymia strikes at unpredictable times, not always invited, this is one of those times when I can’t tell if I’m 100% at peace or not, but I feel like I might be.

Nothing has changed. My aunt is still gone. It’s her son’s (my cousin’s) birthday today, so my thoughts and feelings have turned to him. And my mom, of course.

My own tears have dried. Yesterday’s torrent of tears triggered an instantaneous, explosive histamine attack, for which not one, but two, doses of antihistamine were necessary to knock it out–and knock me out as well.

I sacked out last night before 10pm, in front of my favorite TV Comfort Brain Food: House MD.

And although I can’t remember anything specific, I really do wonder if the spirit of my aunt stopped…

View original post 487 more words